(This article first appeared in the May print edition published April 30)
It’s exciting when a couple begins planning their dream wedding! However, saving enough money for the big day can be challenging. As a society, we are obsessed with doing things like everyone else. So, if another couple goes into debt paying for an elaborate wedding, we’re prepared to do the same. And because of ready access to credit cards, we have the means to create weddings that we don’t have the cash to pay for. If you’re tempted to say, “Charge it,” consider limiting credit card usage to 15% of your wedding expenses.
The first wedding planning stage is an excellent time to discuss your financial plans as a couple. Is there graduate school in your future? The purchase of a home? Are you planning on starting a family? These factors may determine how much you’re willing to spend or how deeply you will go into debt. Creating a carefully planned wedding budget will help you avoid getting carried away with expensive vendors and venues that may be beyond your means. By setting a budget beforehand, you can better allocate your funds and ensure that your wedding is both beautiful and affordable.
After agreeing on a budget, you have a greater chance of sticking to it if you write everything down. Use two spreadsheets, one for the funds you estimate you’ll need and one for the actual funds spent. If you haven’t opened a separate checking account for wedding expenses, now is the time to do it.
Funding your wedding could call for sacrifices—taking on freelance work, renegotiating your mortgage or lease, foregoing vacations, giving up restaurant meals and renting movies rather than going to the theater are ways to help increase your wedding fund. Negotiate prices of wedding goods and services and honeymoon expenses, and be sure to ask friends and family to help create some items for your wedding.
Forget the extravagant gown. Bridal gowns are becoming more sophisticated, with many cut on the bias for a more sensual look. They require less fabric and are, therefore, less expensive. Opt for flowers that are in season in your area rather than exotic blooms. Have a small, exquisite cake for cutting and serve your guests sheet cakes rather than paying for an extravagant six-layer cake. Doing away with superfluous extras and limiting your guest list are easy ways to save on wedding expenses.
Here are some popular trends to consider: Have your wedding on a weekday, like Thursday or Friday night, or a Sunday afternoon. These days are usually less expensive than a Saturday wedding, and you may have more options regarding the availability of favored venues and vendors; have a morning wedding, as reception menus in the mornings and early afternoons are generally less expensive than evening fare. When selecting your ceremony site, marry at the reception site. Decorate one venue and there’s no transportation cost between sites. Marry at your home and save the cost of a full-blown ceremony and reception.
If you’re fortunate enough to have parents or other relatives offer to help with expenses, remember that when people are paying for something, they tend to feel they have a say in how their money is spent. So, if folks offer to help, graciously accept their generosity, but try to establish some ground rules tactfully. Sometimes, parents aren’t able to help financially, but there’s so much to do when planning a wedding, there will be plenty of non–monetary ways for family members to help.
My love note: You’ll need money to start a married life together, so don’t blow it all on the wedding.
Pem Pfisterer Clark has been hosting the nationally syndicated radio show “Wedding Planning With Pem” for over 20 years. The show provides valuable advice, insider tips, etiquette and money-saving ideas to listeners across the country. Bill Stevens Stark is the executive producer of the show.
