(This article first appeared in the February print edition of the Hendersonian.)
Just like with a lot of other young couples planning a wedding, Madelyn Griffith and Rafael Jabarov had a lot of decisions to make about their big day.
First off, her parents—and notably Maddie’s mother and chief wedding planner Barbie Drury Griffith—lived 4,753 miles away in Henderson, and Rafael’s parents lived 3,754 miles away in Baku, Azerbaijan. Other family members and friends were distant as well.
The couple had met and fallen in love somewhere in the middle—in the beautiful Czech Republic city Prague—where they both attended university and then decided to put down some roots for a time.
What would their wedding day look like?
As plans unfurled, it changed from “wedding day” to “wedding days.”
On Dec. 6, the couple had a small traditional Catholic wedding ceremony—“their first wedding,” as mom Barbie calls it—at Church of the Assumption of the Virgin Mary and St. Charlemagne (dating to 1351 B.C.) in Prague. One week later, on Dec. 13, they had a celebration rich with Azerbaijani wedding culture at Symfoniya Hall in Baku, a city of 2.3 million on the Caspian Sea.
Since then, they have also had a reception in Henderson with family and friends.
Rafael had already lived in Czech Republic for a handful of years when he spotted a cute Westerner with long auburn hair at a public event near the famous Prague Castle.
“It was the freckles,” he said, that caught his attention.
In 2021, Maddie, as she is known, had decided to continue her university studies in Prague because it wasn’t as closed down by the COVID-19 global pandemic and things were operating mostly as normal. When she graduated with a degree in marketing after three years, she made the decision to stay.
Fast forward to Maddie and Rafael’s engagement. Still living in Prague, and with them and their families on three different continents, they briefly considered traveling to Denmark (“the Las Vegas of European weddings”) to get married. But soon they settled on dual celebrations in Prague and Baku.
Maddie would work on taking care of all of the legalities in the Czech Republic and Azerbaijan, and her mom would plan “their first wedding” from nearly 5,000 miles away. Rafael’s family would plan the celebration in Baku with many of the customary elements of a Azerbaijani wedding.
“I worked on it nearly every day from then on” until just a few weeks ago, Barbie said, lining up the venue, a reception hall, working with the Ukrainian weddings coordinator, finding a caterer, arranging for the wedding cake, hiring musicians and photography and making sure Maddie could have the cake-tasting event she’d always dreamed of, which is something that is not part of European wedding traditions.
“That was one thing I was determined to make happen,” Barbie said.
In August she made a pre-wedding trip to Prague, partially to deliver the wedding dress Maddie had found while home for her sister Emily’s graduation (cheaper to deliver in person than to ship), but also to work on some of the topics on her planning checklist.
Eventually she would also travel with two suitcases full of wedding-related items.
Though the wedding was relatively small (about 45 guests including Barbie and her husband Kevin and Rafael’s parents Fuad and Nigar Jabarov) it was organically international with attendance by friends from 18 different countries.
Because it took place in the Christmas season, and especially because “the Griffiths love Christmas,” the dark red and green colors of the season were part of the decor and the church was flooded with candlelight during the traditional ceremony.
Barbie said her daughter didn’t ask for much in the way of wedding frills, but the Griffiths worked hard to plan special touches from afar, such as a pendant for her bouquet honoring deceased grandparents and beloved family pets, white wedding cowboy boots in recognition of being born and raised in Tennessee, a Photo Booth that created a lot of fun and laughter for guests and some special games. The wedding cake was cut with a sword. She and her dad danced to “Edelweiss.”
“It’s not common to have a winter wedding in Europe,” Maddie said, noting that several guests commented on all of the personal touches that were part of the celebration.
“They said they’d never been to a wedding like that before,” she noted. “Everything was perfect. It was so cool.”
After that very full wedding day, the newlyweds traveled for a short break in Rome where they were actually in St. Peter’s Square when Pope Leo XIV appeared to say some prayers for the large crowd gathered in those days before Christmas.
Then it was on to Baku, where for Maddie, at least, everything was a surprise to be encountered.
Despite the language barrier (there were very few English-speaking attendees other than the Griffiths and the newlyweds), Rafael’s parents took over to make everyone feel welcome and very much a part of their new blended family.
As traditional, Rafael explained, he and his family entourage arrived where Maddie and her family were staying on the day of their “second wedding” to collect her and escort her to the festivities. The Azerbaijani had also escorted Maddie, her mom and sister to get make-up and hair done in a traditional style for the day.
A band of traditional musicians arrived with the family along with a photography crew (including a drone photographer) to record their travels to the venue in a fancy rented Porsche driven by Rafael’s brother.
The couple weren’t allowed to see the venue ahead of time, and when they arrived entered through a side door and onto a curtained stage where they were revealed and presented to the attendees in a bright spotlight.
“It was elaborate,” Maddie said, “and it was so much fun. The food was so amazing.”
There were a henna celebration and other rites intended to unite the two families, in the presence of the Jabarovs’ family, friends and community.
There also was the famous Azerbaijani pomegranate wine and much traditional dancing, and Rafael’s father Fuad had thoughtfully surprised the Griffith family with dance lessons (heavy on the arm movements) before the big party.
“Maddie was such a natural that some people thought I was the foreigner out there,” said Rafael.
In another thoughtful touch, Fuad also wrote his speech to the couple and presented it in English, which he really doesn’t speak.
“He worked so hard on it, and it was so heartfelt, so touching,” Barbie said.
Maddie said there was one point during the Baku celebration that she experienced a sort of “out-of-body” experience, asking herself “How did I get here? What am I doing here?”
The whirlwind of early December had certainly been like a fairy tale.
But she said it all represented what it means to meet someone in the middle of two cultures, in this case her new husband who speaks four languages and enjoys small-town life as much as a large city.
“Before Prague, I hadn’t met many international people before,” she said, noting that that’s all changed now. “We can pick the best parts of both of our cultures and blend them while we live together.”
